Adventure....Kenya!

My intrepid partner and I contemplated a warm escape from Cape Town's winter and trailed our fingers on google earth, aiming for the equator. The thinking: warm, tropical climate and a bit of adventure. Our fingers made a halting, tentative stop on the Kenyan coastline, which divided the equator slap bang in the middle. I had a farm in Africa....mmmmm. With the epic story of Karen Blixen's "Out of Africa" on my mind and who know what on JC's, flight tickets were promptly purchased.

He wanted to do his usual kamikaze-style, "drop-in-and-go-where-the-wind-takes-you" travel (seriously, he visited Nepal with a plane ticket, a rough guide to Nepal and 2 pairs of jeans!!!)  I am 'n bit more contemplative, as I have learned that a woman traveling alone (on many occasions) too much impulsiveness is a luxury that can land you in sticky situations. So I irritated him until we had a rough outline and at least a dozen options for accommodation....and off we went.

The adventure looked something like this;

- Take the train from Cape town to Johannesburg
- Hop on a flight from Johannesburg to Nairobi
- Take the "Iron snake of Africa"from Nairobi to Mombasa (their version of our Premiere Classe train)
- Explore the north coast of Mombasa around Malindi
- Turn south and visit Tiwi and Diani
- Fly from Ukunda to Nairobi
- Connect from Nairobi to Johannesburg and then on to Cape Town

We packed in cabin size luggage - our snorkeling gear taking most of JC's back-pack...uhm and maybe a few of my thingies ;)

Next blog the adventures of the "White Masai" unfolds in candid colour....

Blessings

 

 

 

We just returned from an amazing travel experience in Kenya (more on his later) and I am in a reflective mood.

I feel blessed and overcome with a sense of wonder, as if this trip "plugged" me into the universal energy source. Like going back home, the time away really brought me back to myself.

I want to do something worthwhile with my time. I want to grow and experience the wonders of the world. I want to be of worth and of service to the world, I want to embrace every moment and see the joy, the good and the love in everything. I want to be comfortable in my own skin, grounded, compassionate, grateful and conscious...above all, I want to embrace the blessings I have received so abundantly.

“You do not need to know precisely what is happening,
or exactly where it is all going.
What you need is to recognize the possibilities
and challenges offered by the present moment,
and to embrace them with courage, faith, and hope.”
- Thomas Merton

 

 

...and waiting (added)

Where the sea meets the sky in blended blue 

where rivers of heat merge body and soul 

where the wind whips gently, chasing a dream 

that's where she will be waiting for you

 

***

  

And her breath will be a sigh - release; 

the long awaited arrival of Love 

Falling into her nothingness, 

content, complete, at peace...

 

 

 Anne-marie

 

Leading with Grace

This is one of my most avid passions....trying to live with more grace in this world. This is a term we associate with the feminine, but I would like to think it refers to being conscious of how we tread and touch our fellow travelers on this earth.

In the last two decades I worked with only a handful of people whom I would consider to be great leaders, with very few of them being women. As is often the case, in order to survive, and because our teachers and sponsors are often male, we loose our natural grace and femininity, which is a wonderful part of being a woman. It is also, in my opinion, one of the elements sorely lacking in the Corporate world. It is ironic that there are so few women in top leadership positions in the world. Prime Ministers, Governors, Premiers, CEO's and (help us) Presidents are mostly male. Not only because they are outvoted or patronised through employment equity numbers from both genders, but because there is a choice to be made: Who said we can have it all at once...a career and a happy family! They lied! Something, or someone has to give...mostly the wife, but sometimes the (house) husband, or sometimes it has to be a timing thing - But the piper must be paid. Hence the accounts from women at the top are often, if truth be told, a very sore and solitary tale of glamorous editorials and lonely celebrations.

In this left-brain dominated, winner-takes-all world, which often looks at the short term results, the money, the quick fixes, I think a softer and more sustainable hand is required in building relationships and connecting people. I feel blessed that grace comes naturally to women. I would hate to conclude that in order to reach the top, we have to hide, or shed any notion of these "labels". It would be a sacrilege to ban women from the Directorships or keep them in HR or Marketing, or in Operations where, strangely they gain invaluable experience in building relationships by managing all the "lower level staff" and interestingly, are often very close to the customer! This makes us immensely knowledgeable... if we could only make ourselves be heard in the Boardrooms. I know, now I am projecting :)

Yesterday I saw this article and was again reminded that there should be more compelling reasons to have more women in leadership positions than to balance the HR numbers. They should be darn good at what they do, they should bring the balance, the "other perspective", the sustainable factor that comes with with being a natural negotiater and nurturer. They must assist to make companies and the world a better place...They MUST have grace.

bloomberg.com - Companies with women on their boards performed better in challenging markets than those with all-male boards in a study suggesting that mixing genders may temper risky investment moves and increase return on equity.

I say let the real reason for having women shine - I say hooray to all who choose to lead with grace!

 

Also read the following article from Edith Sievers on Women and the Bottom Line:

http://www.usb-ed.com/Blog/Women-and-the-Bottom-Line-Myths-Mysteries-and-Milestones?utm_source=EDFocus35

Inspired :)

I learned quite an important concept at a workshop over the weekend: Knowing when you are truly inspired and when you are dealing with an impulsive emotion, stirred on by ego.

I have often felt truly inspired, almost like this is the only thing you want to do at this moment and nothing else matters. Time and money becomes irrelevant, as this thought sanctions all your senses. An amazing amount of energy whips through your body and you can clearly see where you are going....absolutely focused and really in a zone!

According to our course leader, this is when there is divine intervention, when you are in divine flow with spirit and you absolutely have to act on it, in order to use the window of opportunity created by the universe. I know this is true from deep within my heart.

So...in true spirit of embracing my inspirations, I made a list of what always manages to inspire me:

Obviously....accompanied by....

It does not matter what I feel like first thing in the morning. Meditating or doing a yoga practise makes me want to embrace life....

Travelling....I soooo love going to new new places, tasting new flavors, seeing new faces....I have wanderlust in the worst possible way.

If the destination is by the sea, so much more inspirational!

Then, lately a seem to be inspired by body art, although I am too much of a ninny to put some ink on my own canvas :)

And how can I ignore the bouts of electricity when I encounter these amazing creatures!!!

Then, anything that sparkles and gives light...candles, fairy lights, yes, even a crystal...or better still, a diamond definately makes me light up....

Like all fellow goddesses, a nice piece of clothing...or shoes, or even just a handbag is right up there on my inspiration list.

And last, my favorite!

I love love.....

Not unique or very original. My course leader would probably cringe as I do not think he had a ready made list in mind?! I know, I am a simpleton....an inspired one though!?

Perspective please!

And Tamund and Jung many others throughout history concurred!

But why is it so difficult to see other people's stories and their truths? For me, this is one of the most important steps in becoming mindful: To be able to see the different sides of the picture.

I have worked with many great people, but very few great leaders and one of the things that always pops up (except for ego - we are talking power here!) is lack of perspective.

Without perspective at work, we lack the ability to truly appreciate and harness diversity. We become less of what we can be, by only surrounding us with like-minded individuals, who see the same problems, issues and risks and maybe not all the opportunities out there. It makes us less likely to be inclusive in decision making, less able to feed back why we chose one course of action above another. And definitely out of touch with many of our employees, and more importantly, our customers. Perspective is key when dealing with change. It is the one thing which enables us to answer the WHY question, as it can clarify the reasons for the decision from every angle. It is the basis of systems thinking, it helps with strategy in creating scenario's etc. etc.

At home, perspective is all about assisting to really connect with friends and loved ones. By having their perspective on things, we are able to really communicate effectively in the way that makes us "get" each other. It helps to move from emotional states to a place where we can engage on the issue whilst witnessing each others points of view... It makes us better human beings.

It is just so hard because perspective suggests letting go of our own, to take flight and see the picture from above, rather than standing on the ground and voicing our own perspective only. There is the misunderstanding that perspective means loosing our own opinion. I think we definitely still need to make up our minds about which way to go, but in those initial stages of evaluating our options, it is invaluable to have perspective on the issue. Not to make impulsive and hasty decisions based on emotions and ego only. It also means we have to be open to listen...it is very difficult. And even worse, able to take true feedback from others! All very scary stuff, but in my experience, very, very much worth it.

So, this morning I open my eyes with expectation...my meditation for today....perspective please!

Getting there...

It's freezing outside, but I feel OK....I can honestly say that I do not enjoy the winter!!!
But I have made the decision to be content about being in limbo. I do not understand why I feel the need to be working my *ss off in order to be living with purpose? I am so greatful for the abundance of blessings which surround me at the moment: love and friends and health and security...

My next step will probably be to take on another hectic project, to throw myself into it and to loose some other thread which I hold dear. Ai tog!

I hear Caroline's voice reminding me about our Reiki mantra:

Just for today I will not get angry

Just for today I will not worry

Just for today I will do my work honestly

Just for today I will count my many blessings

Just for today I will be kind to all living things

At least just for today, I feel as if I am getting there...

Waiting...

Where the sea meets the sky in blended blue

where rivers of heat merge body and soul

where the wind whips gently, chasing a dream

that's where she will be waiting for you

I am creative dammit!

I am creative dammit!

My best friend and I regularly go for energy realignment sessions, also called Reiki - A process which ensures all our energy centers or "chakras" are balanced and spinning contently. As usual, my sacral area was completely blocked, which could mean any (or all) of the following things:

1) That I need to look after the reproductive areas of my body
2) That my emotions probably resembles a soap-opera
3) That I should try to let the goddess out of the box....mmmmmm
4) That I must spend more time being creative

Needless to say, my beloved enthusiastically agrees with the diagnosis and has very clear views on how to deal with the reproductive areas, as well as the goddess within! I on the other hand, see this as a clear directive to start cooking (I immediately made a family sized Lasagna and a Roly-Poly for my solitary dinner) and I remembered that writing is also a creative activity - I am writing this blog as you read.

And as for my beloved... I did send him the note below :)

This tempel...

"Here in this body are the sacred rivers: here are the sun and moon as well as all the pilgrimage places...I have not encountered another Temple as blissful as my own body." Saraha

(Thank you for the beautiful quote Veniets!)

I often feel as if am a captive in my own body. As if I can actually fly, but am being held in place within a box. Some mornings when I look at a flight of stairs (read: mountain) and I know it will be a struggle, I can see myself flying over it to the top... when every step is a calculation and fear rules where I think I can go and what I will be able to manage within this body today.

And then there are the times when I walk past a window, or a mirror and for an instant I do not recognise myself, almost as if the picture I have of how I look and walk - who I am, is not what I just saw? Weird!

Let's not even start with the true me, captured between dimples and several layers of padding, resulting in a divided closet. There are the "fat"clothes and the "thin"ones, the days of triumph and the days of despair, when I actually dislike all of myself for how I look? Other that acknowledging that I know how shallow it is to think like this when I look around me - how we all struggle with our bags of issues (pun intended!), it probably forms part of the lessons we have to learn in this life. This body is still (next to money) the most important measure of success in this world. Definitely a topic for another blog entry altogether.

And then there is yoga: The almost surreal feeling, as if to watch yourself from the ceiling, stretching and breathing and being almost weightless as you flow into secret places into your own body. The awareness of being in tune with yourself through different delicious postures....ohhmmmmmm......

The bottom-line (no pun intended!) is that I am on a journey to make peace with this vessel which holds my spirit, the casing which we all look at and form instant opinions about. It is a very humbling experience: the aches and pains, the diseases, the abuse and opinions this Temple suffers - mostly self inflicted. But oh, those moments when we are at peace with each other, when all the past experiences and future expectations become subservient to this moment. When body, mind and spirit become one....pure bliss :)

Weekends...and other disasters!

What a weekend?! A supposedly relaxing (dare I say romantic) weekend turned on its head. The cryptic sequence of events:

1. Car trouble (I will not comment on my beloveds choice of vintage cars, but for the fact that if something is not approaching a jubilee celebration, then nada!)

2. A decision to push faulty car (with me in it) through sandy, uneven terrain

3. A disastrous snap/pop and and there goes a Achilles tendon

Well, to cut a long story short, the plot thickens. We are now minus transport and plus a (very painful) medical emergency, divided between a small town Dr, a Mechanic and the AA, which of course equals disaster....but there were also other interesting events :)

Will a 90kg one-legged, off-balanced man in pain, into- and out off a bath tub about 30cm from the floor. And let's not mention the runny tummy (and the running which ensued because of it), which came about as a result of the pain medication. The sleeping (or lack thereof) arrangements.

Suffice to say, the weekend was not what we set it out to be.

"Life is the growth in relationship and attachment;

the denial of growth is death....

have a room, or a house, or a family,

but don't let it become a hiding place,

an escape from yourself."

Jidu Krishnamurti

Life is....grand!

Paradise Beach Villa Mauritius...

Leora Villas Mauritius....

AMA Ashram India...

Airport Kochi India...

Grotto...

Lérmitage Franschhoek...

Vishoek...

The Views Wildernis...

Oubaai...

Cape Grace Yacht...

En route to the Cederberg....

"...I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable and racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing." Agatha Christie

This most glorious year was (I thought) all about being spoiled and doing the "out of this world" stuff. Nothing wrong with saying I'll only be 40 once in this lifetime, so let me have champaign for breakfast...or eat dessert before dinner...or take a nap after lunch (or sometimes before!). I was on a mission to recite a checklist of grand activities for every month of 2011. And it was AMAZING!!! I have to capture a few highlights:

January - Om namah shivaya India!

February - Cape Grace Yacht en another honeymoon in Mauritius....the 7th one :)

March - Grotto, watching the sun set whilst doing a salute to the sun - Namaste
April - Vishoek....having dinner overlooking the harbour, better than Greece.

May - Kragga Kamma! Blazing fire places, red wine en red meat! I finally decide not to eat animals anymore - This has been a long time coming, love the taste of meat, but I cannot justify eating an animal who may have suffered during its life (or death) to provide me with (questionable) nutrition...so here we go!

July - teaching at GSB (love it!!!!) and then Mauritius....8th honeymoon :)
August - Work - MIGRATION, MIGRATION, MIGRATION! And my heart is breaking, my love and I are changing lanes and we are missing each other completely :(

October - A couples retreat, where I meet the formiddable Marina, a Goddess Retreat in Langebaan with soul sister Venita and guru Caroline and then to Grotto for Johan's 40-something. I meditate every morning on the beach with one eye open, watching Johan frolick naked in the surf...ommmm...uhmmm
November - Teaching at GSB (amazing programme with Absa) and finishing at WFS after 7 years - a truly special company. I cannot wait for the beginning of a new cycle: 2012 will be my year one. It feels like I am done with a part of my journey and I am starting a very different new one which will be all about personal growth and setting up for my next career...

...and during the festive season I start assessing the past year, as we all do. I feel a small shift, a realisation. Yes, life is GRAND, but not for the activities I listed above, although they were lovely. It was a beautiful year because of my best friends' hands on my back in a yoga class, that look from JC, the sms from my parents to say they love me...the small things are the stuff that makes life grand. I am blessed :)

And then we were 40.....

My best friend and I embarked on THAT trip in January 2011....The trip I am referring to is the one we always think about, but never have the courage/money/time/friend to do it with? So all of a sudden, all the elements came together: We were turning 40 and were on our way to India! Then I got really scared....

It always sounded so virtuous and spiritual to say that one is planning a trip to an Ashram in India. It is a very different story to have it looming over you as you scramble to buy the last filtration bottle/vitamin B (and other) injections/GO-Girl (let me not get started on this pink beauty!) and your dearest start sending you links of blond abductions in over-populated foreign countries etc. etc.

An astrologer belatedly told me last month that I will (or maybe already did!) undertake a trip of a life time with a friend (who could also be my sister!) and it will not be my normal comfortable 6* outing with my beloved....it will be HARD but it will change my life! Thanks for telling me AFTER the fact ;)

And so the day arrived on the 1st of January 2011. They say pictures say a 1000 words. It took me 4 months to find the words... It will certainly take a few posts to get it out of my system, so please bear with me as I unravel ungracefully.

Om namah shivaya x

I choose the blessings...

Caroline, my Reiki teacher once told us that she is able to see our true potential. Just a glimpse of what we could be, would open up a world without limits. Bottom line, we limit ourselves through our thoughts, which only extend to what seems possible, and in doing that, we become disconnected from who we truly are.

I believe this is true, as I have seen so many of my near and dear living their self-fulfilling prophecy. Sometimes of their own creation, but most often of those around them, who with love, eloquently label, stereotype and project their own perspectives onto someone else. I am also a product of struggling (like a size 12 into a size 8 jean) to get rid of my own limited thoughts of who I am.

So from today, I have a new mantra....it says: "I choose the blessings!"...and with that I mean any great thought or dream on my own health, wealth or wisdom, I will embrace and wear like a favorite woolly blanket. I will become unashamedly the best me I can be, without guilt or reservation...one with my higher self :)


“Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” – Carl Jung